Weasley's Return
by Froginatub
Summary: Fred and george come back as polter geits and continue to run thier shop. Others decide too follow suit, both good and bad.
1. sorry, you're dead

Chapter #1 Sorry, you're dead.

An old white-haired man sits at a polished wooden desk in the middle of a large marble cavern. There is a long Line of people trailing from the desk as far as the eye can see. A red haired boy stands in front of the desk. The man is surveying papers and marking down something with a pen. The Child looks around the spacious room, waiting for the older man to notice him, He takes in the grey granite floors, the smooth white walls stretching forever upwards. He also sees an elevator and a trapdoor beside three Doors set almost seamlessly into the walls. Finally, he looks at the weathered old man with the half moon glasses. "_DUMBLEDORE?_" The Teen asks in astonishment. The man looks up From his papers. "why, it's Fred!" he exlams, "Good to see you, but horrible to see you. So, how'd you die?" He asks surveying Fred over the top of his (rather lopsided) half moon Spectacles. "Wha'?" Fred asked. "Oh. So you _don't_ know." Commented an exasperated Albus Dumbledore, rubbing his temples. "Okay. Here goes. Sorry, but your dead. When people die, they come here and tell me were they want too go after death. Move on, Reincarnate, Ghost, polter geist , You get the picture." He flourishes His pen as if to emphasize his point. Fred grinned, a large smile spanning his face. "POLTER GEIST!!!" he yells, Making half the people in the cavern jump.

"Thought so." Said Dumbledore with a chuckle, Readjusting his glasses. "Walk through that door over there. I think I have a good place too send you." He smiles. "Have a good life- errrrrr After life" "Thanks old Geezer." Says Fred over his shoulder as he opens a door carved into to the rock and goes through. "oh, and Fred, go easy on Filch." "Can't make any promises sir." Fred yells. He hears Dumbledore Say "Hello, Tom" And gets propelled through a passage leading off from the door by a cool wind. "God, It's been a heck of a day."

END OF CHAPTER.

A.N. hey, first fan fiction an' all that crap. Sorry the chapter's so short. I'll make longer ones ,I swear! J.K. Rolling owns these Charactors, But it's my story line. My sister (**pepper66** ) Helps me edit. Check out her story. (**The ****post****death**** ramblings of ****Cho****Chang****)(**Cho Chang reflects upon her death in the final battle afterwards, contains her thoughts on Voldemort, Hogwarts and the war in general.) Thanks, Please review, yadda yadda yadda.


	2. weasley's wizarding wheezes

A.N. wish I did own Harry Potter , but I don't. So I won't gripe. P.s. to AzureFalls I _know _Poltergeists aren't real dead people, but it's a cool Idea so chill. Thanks to AzureFalls and Meals10 for being the first ones to review/ story alert. You rock! If you comment (and sign it)I'll mention your name. Please review.

P.P.S. This chapter _is_ longer right?

-Froginatub.

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"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, we will remember Fred Weasley Forever, And He will always Live in our hearts. Fred was-" Percy Weasley Was cut off mid- sentence By A loud (and familiar) voice shouting

"Lets gets this party started!" and dropping a crate of dung bombs on his funeral.

"GRED!" yelled George

'FORGE!" yelled his ghostly counterpart.

"FRED!!!" Yelled every one in the small clearing Yelled.

"It's so good to see you darling." Rambled Mrs. Weasley. "I missed you so much. George was just falling to bits. I can't be live you're back I really hoped you'd come back as a ghost, but I never really tho-"

"Mom?" Fred asked.

"yes darling?"

"Can We just bury that coffin and skedaddle? Me and Forge over there Gotta Re-open The shop."

"You're Still interested in our Store?!" Asked George excitedly. He and Fred ran off to prepare the grand re-opening of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes.

"Well, I suppose Fred is still dead, so we may as well bury the coffin." Muttered a befuddled Arthur Weasly.

_**MEANWHILE…**_

"Hey Fred!" Yelled George, throwing a pillow at His sibling's head.

"Mmmmm?" Fred mumbled

"I found something…" he said picking up a curled piece of dusty paper from the corner of the store.

_Why are you worrying about you-know-who?_

_You_ **should **_be worrying about_

**U-NO-POO-**

_The constipation sensation that's gripping the nation!_

Fred floated over to take a look at the paper and laughed.

"I remember writing that. We should make a new Sign." He stretches his arms over his head as if imagining his words in lights.

"_Celebrating the fall of _Voldemort?

_The death eaters aren't. _

_Voldie's death put 100s of_

_Foul criminal scum out of work. So _

_Please, support your local_

_Ex- eaters today."_

"Excellent Fred!" George held up a bright blue sign with a red border. It had Fred's exact words spelled out in bold black text. "Wait…" George grabbed a can beside the cash and tapped it with his wand. Now it was also blue and red. He put a slit in the top and tossed it to Fred. "what do ya' think?" he asked.

"Cool. It needs something else though… I know! The pale twin tapped the can with his wand. The words "**donate now**" blossomed in black ink across the paper.

"SICK!" yelled George. Let's hang it up.

"Hey, we should call Verity. She'll probably need a job. And we'll definitely need an extra hand." Fred hovered over to the phone, picking it up and yelling U NO POO into it. 'Password verified' a mechanical voice said and a clockwork owl emerged from the muggle phone. "Verity Lake, tell her Weasley's Wizard Wheezes wants her back." The metal owl beeped and flew off, leaving the two boys to work on their pride and joy. They took the boards off the windows and door. Fred grabbed a "paint bomb" Disguised as a quill and threw it at George. George threw one at Fred (witch went right through him) and Pretty soon the room looked like it had been attacked by a home hardware.

"Cool paint job!" George said. Now the store looks good, but we still need to stock the shelves, replace the windows, paint the door and fix the awning."

"Great. I'll get the shelves and door, you get the windows and awning." Fred looked really suspicious. "Alright, see you soon!" Fred floated to the basement and took a pygmy puff. (oddly still alive) And put it in the mouth of a drinking fountain that served pumpkin juice. It squealed and struggled. Fred gave it a daydream potion and it shut up and began to drool. Then, he carried a box of decoy detonators upstairs. "Oi, George, did You know we have a drinking fountain in the basement?"

"Really? That's great, I'm thirsty." George walked down stairs and shrieked. "FRED!!! What…is…this!?!?!?"

"oh, that's Merlin the pygmy puff. I guess he crawled into the drain. Bad Merlin. Bad." Fred scolded the pygmy puff. Then he handed George the bruise cream for his black eye where Merlin had shot out of the fountain and hit him in the face.

"So, Poltergeist huh. What's that like? Kinda' weird to have a ghost for a brother. Gonna' be cool to see their faces though." George looked dreamy. "all the people that thought you were dead."

"uhhhh…George, we really need to work on the store. Ya' know? I'll get some more supplies from the basement if you fix the broken window and hang up our new poster."

"Fred, we can do this tomorrow but I really need some sleep." George said.

"Oh, ummm, sure George. Lets go upstairs and get some shut-eye."

"Thanks Fred." George ran upstairs and Fred floated after him. He waited until George was asleep and then went back downstairs, he mended the window and hung up their support the death eater's sign. He Tapped the awning with his wand so it turned green and the words Weasley's Wizard Wheezes replaced eas ey' W zAd Whzes. Some of the letters had come off during the war when they hadn't been managing their store. The door was soon green to match the awning. Fred made multiple trips down into the basement and brought up all the merchandise. Then he went to Gringots and changed some wizard money into $100 muggle money. Then he aperated to toys R us and bought a toy for $5. He than aperated to a Loblaws and bought $75.68 worth of marsh mallows. He had a great plan. He snickered and aperated back home.

END OF CHAPTER!

So, how was that? Chapter #2. If anyone guesses what he bought at the toy store, and signs with initials, nick name, whatever, I'll mention them in the story. Somehow.

-Froginatub.


	3. Up to something

A.N. please review. I took longer this time, I know. I was on vacation Sorry! Thanks to everyone who reads my story. You rock! I would've sworn were it says crap on the 1st line, but this thing's rated k+ so…

65 hits. Woohoo!

-Froginatub

p.s. If you play Pokemon, you'll probably notice that the name Verity

lake is a name of a lake in Pokemon. Completely Accidental. Sorry.

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**BANG!**"crap." Fred floated upstairs to see if the loud noise had woken his brother. "Nope, still sleepin' like a log." Fred went through the floor and back downstairs. " god, being a poltergeist is so, freaking cool! I can go through walls n' stuff, but I can also pick things up." Fred stopped talking so he wouldn't wake his brother. He was making a fort out of pillows in the back room, were they developed products. A crate of nosebleed nougats had fallen and made a loud noise. Fred Waved his wand and pillows zipped around and created a castle-like structure. Fred popped a whole in the wall and stashed all of his marshmallows inside his fort. "There. Now… to wake up George…" Fred grabbed a bag of marshmallows and his marshmallow bazooka, then floated up through the floor. "HEY!" Fred screamed.

George P.O.V.

"HEY!" was the first thing I heard that morning. Then I had puffy white cushions shot at my head. "See you down stairs. Sucker!" My brother zipped downstairs leaving me sticky, and confused.

"C'mon down George, If you're brave enough!" I do like my brother, and I am glad he's back but sometimes I wish he stayed dead, errrrr… un-poltergiest.

"I'll be right there George." Really. 'If you're brave enough' he can't bait me into coming downstairs with that. _But he did_ said a little voice in the back of my head. I told it to shut up. I trudged downstairs. "Holy Merlin, Fred it's 4:00 in the morning! You'd better have some coffee ready for me." I yelled, glancing at the clock. "Fred?!" I asked, when the usual witty remark was absent. "Fred?!" I called again. "FRED!!!???" I couldn't loose Fred again. Not again. "Fred?"

"what, are you practicing to be a parrot?" He floated out of the back room, closing the door slyly behind him. I wouldn't have noticed, but I'd been living with Fred for my whole life.

"What're you doing in there?" I asked, Immediately suspicious.

"what? Were? Nothing. I'm not doing anything. Why do you ask?"

"Fred…" Now I was _sure_ he was up to something. "Spill it."

"Well, come in and see If you're so intent on ruining my fun." I was about to step inside when a pleasant voice blared from he muggle phone on the counter. "Message accepted. Said person Verity Lake Confirmed job with said employers "Fred and George."

"Great! Verity is coming to work for us again!"

"Eh, I don't really care. I never really liked Verity anyway." Fred whined.

"Fred!" I yelled.

"I'm just kidding George. God can't you take a joke anymore?" Fred pretended to flip his hair and stormed off.

"Well I guess I can just come see what you were doing in the Back room." I yelled, walking towards the door.

"No. nononononononon" fred said. "No."

"I'll give you 5 minuetes. Then I'm busting down the door. Literally."

" 'kay." Yelled Fred, his voice already muffled from the silencing charm that they had put on the door a year ago.

_I guess we'll have to replace that charm. _I mused.

"you can come in now!" Fred called.

And I walked into the room.

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A.N oooooh, a cliff hanger. I'll try too write faster, But I'm going to P.E.I. soon, so don't hold your breath.


	4. FRED?

A.N. I 'm sooooooooooo sorry about the month long delay, But vacation, then camp… You probably think that I get _**tonnes**_ of reviews, but I've only gotten one. I got two alerts. I told you about them, remember? So, even if you don't have an account on Fanfiction,

Please review, Just sign with a nick name or something. Please? 132 hits, Woot!

-Froginatub.

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Normal P.O.V. "Waaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrggg!" With a warlike cry, Fred Weasley charged at His brother. He raised a gun over his head and George thought: _this is it. I'm about to die. At least I can come back as a poltergeist and-_ Poof Poof Poof! Fred, from inside his pillow-fort where he had jumped while George had been speculating, Was shooting marshmallows at George's head. But George, being raised in a wizard family, had no idea what marshmallows were.

"FRED!" he yelled over the din of Fred's enchanted marshmallow gun. "WHAT ARE THESE?" George held up a marsh mallow for Fred to see. Fred tapped the gun with his ghostly wand and It stopped shooting.

"Come into the shop with me. We can sit on the couch and talk about it while we wait for Verity." Once the twins were seated, Fred launched into his tale "so, at around one a clock last night, I floated into muggle town. I went into a store and bought a whole bunch of these." Fred held up a marshmallow. "they're called 'marshmallows'. I gave the person at the cash quite a fright when I paid." Fred chuckled. "So, anyway, then I went to a Muggle toy store and I bought this." Fred showed George the marshmallow gun. "I tricked it out so it can hold up to one hundred thousand marshmallows, and it will shoot them continuously until it's out of ammo. I did a duplicating spell, and now we have about a thousand in stock. I thought we could sell them."

"alright, then lets put them on the shelves." George said. "but one question. How'd you find out about this stuff?"

'What stuff? The marshmallows?" Fred nodded. "I heard Harry ranting about how Dudley Got a marshmallow gun and was shooting marshmallows at him.

"George?" a tentative voice rang out from the door way. It had started to rain and a very wet, unhappy looking Verity Lake stood at the door.

"Oh, hey Verity, come on in." Fred went to open the door.

"FRED!?" asked Verity loudly "but you're…I mean…Aren't you..,"

"Dead? I know. Still am." Fred flashed her a smile. "Poltergeist is the way too go.

"You're dead. I am talking to a dead guy." Verity looked a bit freaked out.

"Come on Verity, after all the things we've done are you really surprised?" George raised one eyebrow.

"Well, But, No I don't suppose I am" replied Verity, looking defeated

"Good." Fred walked over with a pile of gold banners that said: **Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. Grand opening.** "Go put these up for us. You're already wet."

Verity took the banners and left the store. She was beginning to regret answering that clockwork owl yesterday.

"Hey George." Fred whispered "happy pranking." And opened the door just as they had every morning.

"oh, Fred I missed you."

"What's not to miss really?" asked Fred then he shut up as the first customers walked into the store.

"Hello, Welcome to Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, how may I be of service?"

"FRED?!"

"That's my name, don't ware it out."

The rest of the afternoon there was a steady trickle of customers each of them yelling a surprised 'FRED?!"

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Sorry, I know it's short, but I wanted to get a new chapter out as fast as possible. Please review! (Seriously) Tata for now

-Froginatub


	5. Merlin the pygmy puff

A.N. Soooo….. Hi. It's me. I haven't updated in a looooong time. I don't really have an excuse except that I'm a lazy bum. Sorry. No reviews. REVIEW! Please? (whimpers) Please?...

-Froginatub

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??????????????? P.O.V.

_It had been a busy day at the store. Lots of people. Loud. I wasn't noticed. I haven't been since the loud-pale-red top-boy threw me under this shelf. Scared. Alone…. There are others in the hard-cold-box in the basement. I could free them. I could try. I will try. I started out from under the shelf. One of the humans in the store comes down the many-small-cliffs. He grabs me. "there you are Merlin" he says. I wince at the loud gibberish. I must free my kin. I writhe in his iron grip and bite down. Hard. He yelps loudly and I roll down the many-small-cliffs. I can hear my brothers and sisters. I will rescue them._

No P.O.V. "OW" George yells as Merlin the pigmy puff bites him on the hand. Fred floats over.

"how are ya George?" he asks.

"fine now.. but remember how you stuck the pygmy puff in the fountain? I saw is under the shelf. So I went over and picked it up, but it squirmed, bit me, and jumped down the stairs!"

"mmmm." Replied Fred. "looks like its turned feral. I blame you, of course."

"ME!?" spluttered George angrily. "you're the one who let it out of the cage and set it loose!"

"keep tellin' yourself that buddy old boy." Fred drifts off.

George P.O.V.

I _HATE_ Fred. Honestly. _He_ opened that cage. _He _set the pygmy puff loose. Not me. It's late though. I'm tired and the busy day at the store wore me out. I'll tell Fred to take over the cash and go to bed... my hand aches were the little beast bit me. I hope it doesn't get infected…

A.N. short eh? But I only made it sort because It makes the story 'flow' better. G'night!

-Froginatub


	6. Hello afterlife

A.N. heloooo. I started this chapter as soon as I finished the other. Same as chapter five's author's note. Review, please, whimper, ya know…

-Froginatub

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George P.O.V.

_Were am I? a huge marble cavern… An old man at a desk… doors at the back… I'm sure I've never been here before… then…why does it seem so familler? Oh! This is the place fred described to me the place he went when he…when he died. So it must be a dream. I won't remrmber anything of this in the morning. I can't....i'm not….. I shouldn't be… dead… but now the line's going forewords. I'm at the desk. The old man is telling me I __**am**__ dead. I want to be a poltergeist. I need to be! I tell him. He directs me to a door. My hand is killing me. So…it can't be a dream. Hello afterlife. Suddenly, I'm hovering over my bed in the store. Fred is crying. Over my dead body. Litteraly. I swoop down, and tell him it's okay. I'm here. He hugs me, and the embrace seems solid and warm. Huh. He tells me my hand got really infected from the pygmy puff bite. It got into my blood, then into me heart, stopping it instantly. I look at the corpse's hand. My hand. It is swollen and gross. I am dead. I shall go tell mom and dad. They may worry._

A.N.

This one's short too, but if you put it and chapter five together, you get a decently sized chapter. Please please please please review.


	7. darker than basements

**AN soooo…..ummmm hi. Look, I **_**know**_** I haven't updated in like, a year but….. anyway I know I'm in no place to ask things of you, but really? I've gotten less than five reviews in total. Go ahead, one word reviews, throw some digital tomatoes, but please please please **_**PLEASE**_** review.(please?) ** **Not neither Pov no more y'all.** **Fred awkwardly let go of George. To make up or the hugging incident, he punched George. Right in the face. ** "**hey, what….OW!" George brought his hand to his face. "what was that for?"** **Fred shuffled his feet awkwardly. "well, you know…" his voice became a whisper. "hug."** **George smirked and said "c'mon, lets go see Mom and tell her about…" he gestured at all of himself "oh, and Fred? I won't tell a soul."** **Fred blubberd his thanks, but his counterpart was already downstairs. ** "**About the punching part!" George exclaimed. ** "**You little…" Fred followed him downstairs, or rather, down floor, floating downwards quickly to catch his brother.** "**Fred….." came a warning voice from down stairs.** "**yeah?" Fred floated quickly towards the source.** "**uhhh, I think you should have a look at this." When fred came in,he swore loudly and violently, yelling all of the crude words he knew in a stream of gibberish.** **The boys were looking at a note.** _**Dear scum,**_ _**I'm back. Aren't you glad? Only one of me… the others need to come… we'll get stronger much like you I will return from the grave! Stronger and better, untouchable! I will rise again!**_ **Whoever had written the letter had failed to sign a name. It was pinned to the dead body** **of ** **Verity lake. ****Somewhere unknown to the living or dead, or any mixture of both, something was stirring, dark as the corners of the basement, the corners small children cower in fear from. But a simple light switch won't make this beat lighter. It oooozed up to the counter, were an old, old man was sitting. "Polter giest." Demanded the thing. ** " **Very well than." Said the old man. He pointed to a door. "That way."** **AN I know my chapters are supa short. But I will try to make new chapters more often… don't expect one in the next two weeks though. My class is doing EQAO For those of you who don't know what that is, it's basically a huge that happens every 3 years test all day, every day for two weeks to test the teacher's skills. (but the students have to do it…. Hmmmm..)**


	8. Phone calls

**A.N. hey. UM…. Well I'm baaaaack! Thanks to mic for reviewing Yeah… I did kill a lot of people. And I'll try to make the chapters longer. Thanks to NatureSauvage for story alerting. Made my day.116 visitors. Awesome. Umm, so how many seconds out of your day would it take to push the little review button down there and write "AWESOME" or "GOOD" or "THIS STINKS" or "AWEFUL" ? about 25 seconds. So please review. More people dying. Disclaimer: Nope, Don't own harry potter. **

George sat down heavily. "Why isn't Verity at work yet?" he mumbled, and passed out.

Fred ran into the street. forgetting in the moment that he could float. He stood on the curb and swore again. Loudly shouting a single crude word to the street. Then he doubled over and puked up his guts, leaving shimmery silver-white vomit by the side of the road. A scream came from in side.

"GEORGE!" Fred Yelled, Racing inside, he prayed his brother would be alright. George sat, perfectly unharmed in the middle of the hall. Behind his head, embedded in the wall lay a dagger. A snake was engraved winding up the blade, and a small one made out of emeralds was set into the pommel.

"Went right through me" A dazed look had come into George's eyes. Fred went over to inspect the blade. With a shaking hand, he reached out and touched the snake on the pommel. The snake hissed menacingly and un coiled itself, slithering down the hilt of the blade and wrapping itself around the handle. The pommel sprung open. A note was enclosed inside.

Hello again Weasly_._Read the note. Now I've killed two of your friends. How many more must die? We shall see. Now two of me reside in this world. We shall stop at nothing to regain power.

-The two that are one

p.s. how is your mother?

With a strangled cry, Fred dropped the note. He sat next to his brother. "They….IT… tried to Kill you." He felt Georges head where the dagger would have gone through. He felt a ragged wound. "Weird…" He hauled George to his feet. "Come on." He said. "We're going to go see mom. NOW"

"wha- why…." George protested.

"NOW" Fred Floated quickly to the door. George followed. Almost as an after thought, Fred darted back into the house. He waved his wand, and a closed sign appeared On the front window of the store.

-In a marble cavern, a ghostly horrid creature crept up to a desk. An old man sat at the desk. Many knew him by the name Dumbledore. In the constantly growing line behind the desk, many others knew him as simply their goal. "Poltergeist" the creature rasped.

"Okay. " the old man pointed behind him. "that way please sir." Without so much as a thank-you, the thing drifted towards a door.

The twins reached their Mother's house quickly. Fred rang the bell.

"What's this all about Fred?" George demanded.

Fred held out the note. "this." He said grimly. "this."

Just then Ms Weasly opened the door. "Boys!" she enveloped both of her sons in a hug. "George, sweetie, you're dead." She seemed rather unfazed.

"yes, mom. I am. But that isn't why we're here." George held out the note.

Ms Weasley quickly read it. "oh, boys. I think you two better come inside."

"MOLLY" came a voice from inside. "We just got a call." Mr. Weasly swallowed. Harry's dead."

Suddenly, a note drifted through the window.

_Hello, Weasly family. Now I've killed three people close to you. How many must die before I rise? We shall see. Now 3 of me reside in this world._

_-the 3 that are one_

Mr. Weasly still looked confused. "what's this all about boys?"

"we don't know" Muttered Fred darkly. "but all tell you what I know. Quickly, Fred explained, George chiming in when he left something out.

"oh dear." Mr. Weasly shook his head. "oh dear." He looked like he'd seen um.. .a ghost. (AN: yeah, I had to do that.) "we must call the relatives." His tone had become businesslike. "no one is safe alone. All our family and friends must come to the house."

"dad?" Fred put in.

"Yes, son?"

"What about Harry and Ginny's place?"

" Oh, _Grimmauld Place?" Mr. Weasly looked thoughtful. "well, it's certainly big enough."_

_Thus began The series of phone calls that reached every friend and family member of the Weasley's and told them to come to the space between 11 and 12 Grimmauld Place._

**_A.N. Well, that's that. 8 is my favorite number, so I hope chapter 8 is a good one._**

**_ REVIEW!_**


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